Graduation is a bright spot for every student. For Shawn Gardner, however, it’s more than that: It’s a light at the end of one of the darkest tunnels of her life.
"I went through a lot of hardships during my time here," noted the newly graduated ODI Scholar (YSP). "There was a time when I was out of school; I had dropped out just to re-enroll and flunk out again." Gardner said she also had a lot of mental health issues, and at one time, survived a suicide attempt.
Without ODI, the Dayton native says she never would have been able to graduate and perhaps would not even be alive.
“It was a really dark time in my life, and Dr. [Chila] Thomas was really there for me and continued to reach out and motivate me,” Gardner commented. “The only reason I came back to school was because Dr. Thomas set up a meeting for me with Dr. Wendy Smooth, and that really is what got me back on track.”
This December, that track culminated with Gardner’s graduation, where she earned a degree in English creative writing, an outlet of hers from a young age.
“I’ve been doing creative writing since I was literally a child. Second grade is when it became super serious,” Gardner said. “I would create five-page short stories while my classmates were just learning how to read and write.”
As a Buckeye, Gardner connected with other creative writers through Never Let Your Pen Dry and the Grove Creative Writing Community. She was also involved in the Black Student Association (BSA) and SHADES, an organization for queer students of color.
“My YSP Academic Success Partner, Imani, really encouraged me to get involved,” Gardner explained. “That was always where I found my people, and I always felt at home.”
As she looks toward a career in copywriting or freelance composition after graduation, Gardner is glad to have been a Buckeye. “I really was trying to fight the school spirit for so long, but once you get involved, you really do feel such a sense of pride for the university,” she noted.
She hopes her story will help other students who are struggling with mental health feel less alone.
“It’s important to understand that you are who you are, you’re here for a purpose, and you matter. I feel like that can get lost in translation, especially in college. Since you’re so tied to your work, your performance, your presentation, and everything outward, it’s easier to get caught up in your inner world,” Gardner commented. “I learned that you really can put yourself first. Going through that dark period really led me to come back with a renewed sense of self and a renewed sense of the world around me, and that strengthened my journey.”
Gardner encourages students to seek out support and make the most of all the university offers.
“Definitely utilize your resources. ODI has been such a huge support system for me, and it can be for you, too,” she said. “I know it is so hard to ask for help, and it is so hard to put yourself out there, but it is so worth it in the end.”
If you or someone you know is an imminent danger to themselves or someone else, go to the nearest ER or call 911.
If you are thinking of harming yourself and need a safe, non-judgmental place to talk or if you are worried about someone else and need advice about what to do, call the Columbus Suicide Prevention Hotline at 614-221-5445, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 9-8-8 or 800-273-8255 (TALK), or reach the Crisis Text Line by texting 4HOPE to 741741, or visit the Commission on Student Mental Health and Well-being for additional information.